www.healinestheatre.com

-- "Shattering" (After Six) in Vancouver 24 Hours, Tuesday September 30 2008

Go ahead and type www.healinestheatre.com into your browser's address bar - or click that green link. Find any more info about Shattering? No? Compare the name of the presenting theatre with the website's address to discover why not.

yesterday's game

-- Photo caption in Vancouver 24 Hours, Monday September 29 2008

I imagine the writer wrote the above caption on Sunday, at which time it was yesterday's game. However, the writer failed to recognize that the paper's readers would be reading the caption - at the earliest - on Monday, at which time it was Saturday's game.

Naomi's plans to reunite her parents backfires

-- "Tonight's top TV picks" in Vancouver 24 Hours, Tuesday September 30 2008

This is a basic agreement error. A single plan backfires, while multiple plans backfire.

Qualified resumes send resumes to

-- UPS classified ad in The Vancouver Courier, Friday September 26 2008

I believe (or, rather, I personally believe, as is the current trend) that they want qualified candidates to send resumes, though any resume that can send itself would likely be hired immediately by any company, for novelty alone.

PINAPPLE

-- Concession stand at Meadows Maze in Pitt Meadows, BC, Friday September 19 2008

A pinapple juice drink sounds painful. I picture the juice repeatedly stabbing my throat on the way down.

On Meadows Maze's homepage, another error is in clear view..

Can you spot it?

guest-stars; ONMI; Sarah Jessica Kennedy; more no's than yes's; Sarah Parker Kennedy

-- "24 seconds with Jessica Parker Kennedy" in Vancouver 24 Hours, Thursday September 25 2008

Prepare yourselves. Maybe you should be sitting. The trouble begins in the photo's caption. The phrase guest stars shouldn't have a hyphen, and it's OMNI, not ONMI. The article subject's name is correct in the caption, and the headline, but then incorrect in the opening sentence. How does that happen? I'm guessing the writer had Sarah Jessica Parker on the mind. As you can see, the initials used in the article are correct. Then, we have more no's than yes's instead of more nos than yeses.

But wait, it gets even better. In the subsequent edition of Vancouver 24 Hours, Friday September 26 2008, is this:

The actress was never mistakenly referred to as Sarah Parker Kennedy! Will the readers get a For The Record for For The Record?

Ed Mahon

-- "Sense of Humor" (entertainment in brief) in Vancouver 24 Hours, Friday September 26 2008

Ed McMahon. You were clearly trying for Ed McMahon. You failed.

check check online

-- "Whose eyes are these?" in Vancouver 24 Hours, Wednesday September 24 2008

After several days of being error-free, this newish features returns to its old ways.

Defencemen Rob Davison

-- "No funny business" in Vancouver 24 Hours, Tuesday September 23 2008

Davison is a single entity, therefore Defencemen should be Defenceman.

in this years festival

-- "Stars flock to town for VIFF" in Vancouver 24 Hours, Wednesday September 24 2008

Correction: in this year's festival

American's Next Top Model

-- "New on the tube" in Vancouver 24 Hours, Wednesday September 24 2008

A similar error occured on the same page of the same paper twenty days earlier. It's closer to correct this time, but talent? No.

guarenteed

-- LA Weight Loss Centers advertisement in 24 Hours Vancouver, Monday September 22 2008

Last time it was a twice-guarenteed sandwich ad. This time it's a bigger one-off at the top of the back of the paper. And once again guaranteed is spelled correctly in the checklist.

Mary Ellen Turpel Lafond

-- "Adoptions show family is crucial" in 24 Hours Vancouver, Monday September 22 2008

The last name is correctly written as Turpel-Lafond later in the article, so why not here?

Higginbotham, is running

-- "Open Season (local news in brief)" in 24 Hours Vancouver, Monday September 22 2008

Why a comma there? Why?

it's wasn't long before

-- "Greens take walk, talk politics" in 24 Hours Vancouver, Monday September 22 2008

Is it it is wasn't long before or it was wasn't long before?

and wanted run back to

-- "Duck, dodge and skip" in 24 Hours Vancouver, Monday September 22 2008

You wanted to run back to your yuppy gym.

McDonalds // I'll guess I could

-- "Procrastination comes with stress" in 24 Hours Vancouver, Monday September 22 2008

Firstly, McDonald's has got an apostrophe. Secondly, you will guess you could just get started? I guess technically that could be correct, but who says or writes that?

quite well known; The Ottawa-native

-- "No doubt, this art's a hit" in 24 Hours Vancouver, Monday September 22 2008

First no hyphen where a hyphen belongs, and then a hyphen where a hyphen doesn't belong. English 101 anybody? Wait, maybe I should be more tolerant. Perhaps Dhaliwal didn't properly pronounce the hyphen.

choosing instead for

-- "updos rule Emmy runway" in 24 Hours Vancouver, Monday September 22 2008

The correction would entail either omitting for, or replacing choosing with going.

a jubliant Walsh

click image to enlarge

-- "Golden Spikers" in Sports Illustrated, Monday September 1 2008

Walsh was probably less jubilant - sorry, jubliant - after this misspelling appeared.

guarenteed

click image to enlarge

-- LA Weight Loss Centers advertisement in 24 Hours Vancouver, Friday September 19 2008

I like that guaranteed is spelled correctly in the checklist in the ad's right sidebar, but spelled incorrectly in both headlines of this sandwich ad.

to keep it's street free of violators

-- Photo caption in The Vancouver Courier, Friday September 19 2008

Full caption: Parking restrictions from Mount Sinai? St. Mary's Kerrisdale Anglican Church appeals to a higher power - and the forbearance of would-be parkers - to keep it's street free of violators.

It's not it's. It's its.

of healthy 5- to 6-month-old date born minus due date) premature infants for

-- "UBC to study preemies" in 24 Hours Vancouver, Friday September 19 2008

Ummm... what? Anybody want to guess what the writer was attempting to articulate? It looks like sticking an open parenthesis in front of date would do the trick, but I can't make sense of date born minus due date.

But, says, Elana Zysblat, program coordinator for

-- "Vancouver Specials finally get some respect" in The Vancouver Courier, Friday September 19 2008

Comma overload! Comma overload! I suggest jettisoning the second one.

attending five Def Leppard in the span of

-- "30 seconds ruined my life" in 24 Hours Vancouver, Friday September 19 2008

It looks to me like the word concerts got omitted, leaving a somewhat dirty sentence. Or maybe it's just me. Everything is dirty to a dirty mind. However, I do give some points for five and six instead of 5 and 6. Let's make it eleven points.

the strength their showmanship score

-- "Results finally released" in 24 Hours Vancouver, Friday September 19 2008

Of. We were looking for of. In fact, we're still looking.

Poelher's due to become; her depature

-- "Amy Poehler Moves up SNL Exit" on Yahoo! TV, Wednesday September 17 2008

Good call, Amy Poehler. I mean Poelher. No. Wait. Ummmm, Poehler. I'll go with Poehler.

MacMath Secondary School in Richmond

-- "TOUR DE COAST (local news in brief)" in 24 Hours Vancouver, Thursday September 18 2008

If I were a journalist, I would give extra care to make sure all writings of mine that involved education/schools in any way did not contain any errors. It's McMath.

San Fransisco

-- "Battlestar star is now Inseparable (people in the news)" in 24 Hours Vancouver, Thursday September 18 2008

Hey, you. Yeah, you. It's San Francisco. Get it right or don't get it at all. Got it?

a really productive, top line

-- "Don't worry, the 'Nucks won't suck" in 24 Hours Vancouver, Thursday September 18 2008

Why is there a comma there? Awaiting response...

In situations like this

-- "Don't let his problem become your own" in 24 Hours Vancouver, Thursday September 18 2008

The word situations is plural, so it should be either In situations like these or In a situation like this.

with her her stroller

-- "THUG ARRESTED (local news in brief)" in 24 Hours Vancouver, Thursday September 18 2008

Mark Messier: "Betcha can't type it just once."

check check online

-- "Whose eyes are these?" in 24 Hours Vancouver, Thursday September 18 2008

Back-to-back check checks. When will it stop?

Transportation Minister Trevor Falcon; to pedal their new support

click image to enlarge

-- "More cash for two wheels" in 24 Hours Vancouver, Wednesday September 17 2008

The misspelling is in the photo's caption. As can be seen in the article, the correct name of the Transportation Minister is Kevin Falcon. The use of pedal in the caption has me puzzled. If the writer had used quotation marks around the word, or written peddle, then I'd tip my hat to the writer. But as it stands, it looks they just made a spelling error. One last thing: when naming people in a photo, it is customary to use left and right or similar cues to help the reader identify the people. With Campbell named first in the caption, it makes me think that he is the person on the left. He is actually on the right.

check check online

-- "Whose eyes are these?" in 24 Hours Vancouver, Wednesday September 17 2008

Check check, can you hear what I am saying? More problems with this new "Whose eyes" feature. First it was a factual error, followed by a misspelled name. Now it's the double-word phenomenon. Which type of error is next?

west coasts version; but lets hope

-- "A quote disguised as a warning" in 24 Hours Vancouver, Wednesday September 17 2008

Two missing apostrophes in one article. First, the version belongs to the west coast. Second, let's is the abbreviated form of let us.

whether the risk the child

-- "Among the cases... (Kids left in 'unsafe' homes)" in 24 Hours Vancouver, Wednesday September 17 2008

I'm guessing it should read, whether the risk to the child.

homes were have been denied assistance

-- "Kids left in 'unsafe' homes" in 24 Hours Vancouver, Wednesday September 17 2008

At some point before going to print, one has to decide how they want to word it. Go with were, or go with have been, but for the love of fun don't go with both.

designed by by; a framework a "socially just world."

-- "OUT EDUCATION (local news in brief)" in 24 Hours Vancouver, Wednesday September 17 2008

You're leaving? But you've only just arrived! Take one of those bys, change it to for, and stick it after framework.

to give approve seismic upgrades

-- "PROBE NEEDED (local news in brief)" in 24 Hours Vancouver, Wednesday September 17 2008

You can approve seismic upgrades and you can give approval for seismic upgrades, but you can't give approve seismic upgrades.

slight pay cu, for a shorter commute

-- "Shorter commute, less cash?" in 24 Hours Vancouver, Wednesday September 17 2008

I was going to merely suggest adding a t to make it cut, but now I am of the opinion that the t should replace the unnecessary comma.

all about the flare

-- "Footballers kick it freestyle" in 24 Hours Vancouver, Monday September 15 2008

Silly Bennywenny, saying the wrong word. Doesn't he know that the word that best fits what he's trying to say (or so I'm led to believe) is flair, not flare.

a positive colum

-- "Throw cheap-shot ads out the window" in 24 Hours Vancouver, Monday September 15 2008

relationship off the off the ground

-- "If there's trouble keeping the spark lit, it may be time to start a new fire" in 24 Hours Vancouver, Monday September 15 2008

Get off the off the off the ground, off the ground.

the lastest Honda

-- "Say hello to the lastest Honda" in 24 Hours Vancouver, Thursday September 11 2008

The question people are asking: Is it the bestest?

to become fan of this theatre; Metro Town

-- SilverCity Metropolis home page, Sunday September 14 2008

After trying to wrap my head around the whole idea of becoming an official fan of a movie theatre (I failed), can a theatre have just one fan? "I'm king of the world!" "I'm fan of this theatre!" ... to become a fan... would be correct. Also, the mall is officially known in written form as Metrotown. If you're going to leave the Theatre License # and Class blank, what's the point of having it there at all?

David Duchovney

click image to enlarge

-- "Whose eyes are these?" in 24 Hours Vancouver, Wednesday September 10 2008

24 Hours is struggling through a rough beginning with this new second-page feature. On Tuesday Anne Hathaway was referred to as Canadian, and on Wednesday my beloved David Duchovny had his name misspelled. Try harder, folks. Try harder.